NOTE: This is an older piece I wrote for (believe it or not!) The Kapi-Mana News, the local paper covering the Kapiti Coast and Porirua Basin in New Zealand. It came from an email I sent my Mum. She showed it to the editor of the KM News and he asked if I could develop it into an article and here we are. It acts asa a companion piece to this review I wrote of Black Dossier for the Zone, but with a more autobiographical focus. I quite like it, so here it is!
It was an Alan Moore-ish sort of day from the start. We played in a park on Drury Lane, nearby to the Grand Masonic Lodge that features so heavily in From Hell. We sought out mummified cats in the British Museum, the HQ of the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. We encountered a skeleton in the back streets of Covent Garden, like some mystical apparition from any number of Moore's weird and horror comics. And, of course, we met Alan Moore.
We hadn't intended to meet Alan Moore when we embarked on our journey. I take the kids into town for the day once a month or so, to give their mum some space, and to visit the comic shop. At 40 years old I'm still a comics fan, and Alan Moore is one of the main reasons for that. When I was a kid growing up in Titahi Bay, 2000AD – which I used to get each week from Melva Holland's Stationery and Gift Shoppe on Whitehouse Road – was my weekly reason for living. It was a series of particularly clever and Funny Tharg's Future Shock's that made me, for the first time, take a note of the writer's name. It was Alan Moore. I knew some of the artists – Brian Bolland and Carlos Ezquerra were my favourites – but for the first time it occurred to me that someone else had a role in creating these amazing stories.
By the early 80s, Alan Moore was getting work from the big American publishers, Marvel & DC. It was around this time he started working on DC's Swamp Thing, a title that changed the face of comics forever. He was also working on the more grown-up than 2000AD British title, Warrior, where he created Marvel Man and V for Vendetta, recently filmed by the Warchovzkis. In my first year at university, Watchmen was released, one agonising issue at a time over twelve months. It was such a revelation, an extraordinary vision of what super heroes could be and the sorts of story they could tell, what the comics medium could do. I've followed his work ever since, and I've probably read more of his books than any other writer I've ever loved.
So, over a quarter of a century later, every month or so we slog through Covent Garden from Charing Cross Road, up to Gosh Comics for a snoop around the shelves. My boy is quite interested, and vacillates between Batman and Spider-Man, occasionally going for The Justice League. My girl – just two and a half – couldn't really care less, although she did bring the shop to a standstill one time when she spotted Spider-Man and bellowed out a pretty good version of the old Spider-Man theme - “Spider-man, Spider-Man, does whatever a spider can...”
On this visit, the comic shop was a hive of activity, in contrast to the usual air of genial slackerdom. Comic shops are the sort of place where the staff are always ready to chat. Nothing's so important that it can't interrupted for a discussion of the latest travails of Iron-Man or the shenanigans of the Hulk. When I in the sixth form, I discovered VMS Comics in Edwards Street in Wellington, and they were excellent the same, and I remember their easy-going enthusiasm and slightly dusty atmosphere everytime I go to Gosh. In those days, my mother would – insanely – give me a blank cheque every couple of months to pay a visit, and I'd rack up thirty or forty dollars worth, big money in the 80s! When I got my first student overdraft, I immediately blew a hundred dollars on comics. I was crazy for it!
So, I asked the comic shop guy what the story was, and he pointed to a sign. It said, “Alan Moore will be signing copies of Lost Girls, 2nd February 2008.” I couldn't believe it! Alan Moore! Not only an idol of mine, but notoriously publicity shy, never attending cons and certainly never doing anything so vulgar as a signing. But then, never say never, I guess, and events like this sell a lot of books. And let's not forget that the world is full of fans like me dying to shake the hand of our hero! The man's got an obligation!
However, as always, there was a catch. After I'd made our purchases, we had a look outside and there was already a queue forming down the street, with an hour and a half until the appearance of the great man! With two small children in tow, I knew that queuing was not a practical option, so we went off and performed our other missions – lunch with cat mummies, a play in the park near the spooky masons – then returned at three to see what the state of the queue was. It was round the block now, but I dutifully joined it, making the children pledge patience and good behaviour.
Twenty minutes later, with the kids beginning to play chicken in the passing London traffic, and with no movement in the queue, I decided to call it quits. As much as I wanted to meet Alan Moore, I 'd have a hard time justifying a dead child or two to my wife. We went around to the front of the line to see if we could spot him, just so I could say we'd seen him. At the head of the line, though, was a closed black door: people were being shown into Gosh's tiny cellar in groups of ten, and there was no spotting him.
We were about to head home, thwarted, when one of those things happens that, I reckon, only occurs when fans – fans of anything – gather in one place: we were the recipients of a random act of human kindness. The group at the head of the queue looked at the kids, and said that we should go first. I've lived in England long enough that I demurred, with thanks, but they insisted “It's what Alan would want!”
The children got very excited. They didn't have a clue who Alan Moore was, but one of our new friends revealed to then that he is a wizard. While it's debatable whether Moore actually has magical powers, he has made some unusual proclamations about worshipping an ancient Roman snake god, and perhaps “wizard” is a reasonable short-hand for young children for this sort of thing. My two were immediately intrigued!
Presently, the door opened and the next group was admitted down a steep flight of stairs with two small children at the front and myself wielding a baby buggy immediately behind. Behind a desk sat Alan Moore, long hair and beard, dandyish embroidered jacket and patient twinkle in his eye. I explained how we'd been admitted to the front of the queue, and he agreed that it was, indeed, what he would have wanted. The kids were shy, my girl a bit nervous, and I gabbled like a fool, typically. He was affable and avuncular and I shook his hand and thanked him for the pleasure he'd given me over the years.
I didn't get Lost Girls – it's a bit pricey at forty pounds, and Mum's not paying any more – so Alan signed a copy of the latest book in the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen series, Black Dossier, “To Patrick, Louis and Isabella, with love and best wishes, Alan Moore.” Fittingly, the book ends with Prospero, another wizard, and leader of the first League, turning to the reader and saying (in Shakespearean pentameter, of course):
“And more, the very personality
That scrys this epilogue was once unformed
Assembled hastily from borrowed scraps
From traits admired in others, from ideals.
Did fictional examples not prevail?
Holmes' intellect? The might of Hercules?
Our virtues, our intoxicating vice:
While fashioning thyself, were these not clay?”
Maybe that's not true for everybody, but for me, certainly, part of what I am today comes from reading Alan Moore. Books and writers can have a magical effect on us, and in this way I guess Alan Moore is a sort of wizard.
On the way home, though, the kids chattered excitedly about meeting a wizard, and on the train my son asked me, very seriously, “Daddy, if Alan Moore is a wizard, where was his wizard's hat?” We pondered the question, the three of us, and agreed that he probably only wears it when he's actively wizarding.
Sunday, 28 February 2010
Friday, 26 February 2010
Superman vs Batman
Can't you just see Clark Kent weeping a silent tear? "Why does no one love me? *sob*"
Crack for the ego
Speaking of the Guardian comment is free blogs, I placed one of my trademark haw haw hiLARious comments on this story about the old Martin Amis kerfuffle and was amazed when it started getting recommendations. Mostly my comments might get a one or two recommendations, from net bots or sufferers from Parkinson's disease whose fingers twitch over the mouse button at the wrong time, but this one rapidly climbed from five, to ten to twenty and finally topping out at twenty eight!
I sat there refreshing the page view watching the number climb with a sick mix of pride, embarassment and dread (and sure enough, along came someone to wilfully misinterpret what I was saying). I'm a little scared by it now, and while it's gratfiying that my wee skit hit a chord with readers, I find the feelings it evoked frightening. When one receives unlooked for praise, unlooked for condemnation cannot be far behind!
I sat there refreshing the page view watching the number climb with a sick mix of pride, embarassment and dread (and sure enough, along came someone to wilfully misinterpret what I was saying). I'm a little scared by it now, and while it's gratfiying that my wee skit hit a chord with readers, I find the feelings it evoked frightening. When one receives unlooked for praise, unlooked for condemnation cannot be far behind!
More on writing tips
Over on the Guardian blog about their writing tips wotsit, I made a comment that I think is worth hanging on to and expanding a little. I'll do it, cos no one at the Guardian's goona be interested. Hell, no one here's going to be interested, but at least i don't have to answer to Alan Rusbridger.
Lots of people have said to me over the years, "Oh, you wanna be a writer, why don't you write one of them RPG tie-in books/mills & boon/doctor who novel/cheesy fantasy trilogy". It's a good question, lots of perfectly decent writers make money that way, and I guess my response can be taken as self-sabotaging or even somewhat arrogant: "Because I don't want to."
The fact is, I don't actually want to be "a writer". I want to write, and that's a little bit different. I have a day job I vaguely dislike, and thankfully it's unconnected from my writing life. It's still wordy, that's my skill set, but it has no bearing whatsoever on what I do in the evening on my own time (free cell and masturbation - only joking!).
Obviously, I could still be the writer I want to be while working on this work-for-hire stuff, but my current day job pays me much more than a gig hacking out Warhammer novels or what have you. I'd probably enjoy the lifestyle much more, but right now I need money and lots of it, and that's what my day job brings.
FInally, I'm not certain that I'd be any good at that. I hate those kinds of books, by and large, and the world's full opf people who are not just talented writers but genuinely love that shit. I've read cheesy novels before from writers who evidently feel they're above all this crap, and I don't wanna be one them!
When I write, i want to express things about who I am, and if i can't do that I might as well take the money and stick with the fund reports.
For myself, the only thing outside the obvious I have to say is write what you wanna write. The chances of getting anywhere are so slim you might as well enjoy the process. (And if you don't ever enjoy the process, find something else to do with your time.)
Lots of people have said to me over the years, "Oh, you wanna be a writer, why don't you write one of them RPG tie-in books/mills & boon/doctor who novel/cheesy fantasy trilogy". It's a good question, lots of perfectly decent writers make money that way, and I guess my response can be taken as self-sabotaging or even somewhat arrogant: "Because I don't want to."
The fact is, I don't actually want to be "a writer". I want to write, and that's a little bit different. I have a day job I vaguely dislike, and thankfully it's unconnected from my writing life. It's still wordy, that's my skill set, but it has no bearing whatsoever on what I do in the evening on my own time (free cell and masturbation - only joking!).
Obviously, I could still be the writer I want to be while working on this work-for-hire stuff, but my current day job pays me much more than a gig hacking out Warhammer novels or what have you. I'd probably enjoy the lifestyle much more, but right now I need money and lots of it, and that's what my day job brings.
FInally, I'm not certain that I'd be any good at that. I hate those kinds of books, by and large, and the world's full opf people who are not just talented writers but genuinely love that shit. I've read cheesy novels before from writers who evidently feel they're above all this crap, and I don't wanna be one them!
When I write, i want to express things about who I am, and if i can't do that I might as well take the money and stick with the fund reports.
Wednesday, 24 February 2010
Short Fiction Wednesday
Welcome to the first short fiction Wednesday here at Pointless Philosophical Asides! I haven't been reading enough short fiction recently, so I've decided to make a point of reading a story or two every fortnight and making a post about them. Or possibly weekly, I haven't quite decided. We'll see how the time goes.
I've always read short fiction, from when I was a kid reading big collections of stories from Amazing, Astounding and Galaxy, through the big magazines, the small press and now online and in the occasional themed collection. I've written a few myself, with a current published output of ten short stories scatted hither and yon. A couple of years ago I made a point of reading free online fiction, and read a lot of good stuff, so I thought I'd do that again. I'm keeping track of them for the sake of my reading log, and hopefully I'll be able to push some traffic their way and provide a litte encouragement and feedback. Having published stories myself, I know that I scour the internet from time to time seeking some kind of response, and know the joy of finding it, even if the opinion is equivical.
Doctor Diablo Goes Through the Motions by Saladin Ahmed
This is a short super-hero pardoy that hits all the right notes and has some nice character touches. The central idea is pretty good - a supervillain's schemes that come full circle, and Ahmed's dry, characterful approach, made it a bit chewier than the average comics parody, although it does feel a little bit like the sort of thing that Alan Moore might have done in 1985. That's no bad thing, though, and this short and funny story is well worth ten minutes of your time.
Biting the Snake's Tail by Silvia Moreno-Garcia
This near future crime story is set in an over-populated Mexico City. It's got a strong procedural flavour as Gendarme Soledad follows up the murder of a the brass-with-a-heart bar girl. It turns out one of several girls to turn up killed and mutilated in recent months, and she appears to be on the track of a serial killer. She goes from witness to expert, attempting to pick up clues, but not getting very far. Moreno-Garcia does a good job of capturing the crowded out world of the slum where even the roads are blocked by the over-flowing humanity. In my own limited crime reading experience, it reminded me of Doll by Ed McBain, as it follows a similar line of crisp pacing and reliance on interrogation to provide a lot of the drama. I was kind of expecting it to end more conventionally, but that's not quite where it went. It took me a little while to appreciate what the story was up to, and it still feels a little like the first part a longer story and left me wanting to know more about where the case might lead her.
I've always read short fiction, from when I was a kid reading big collections of stories from Amazing, Astounding and Galaxy, through the big magazines, the small press and now online and in the occasional themed collection. I've written a few myself, with a current published output of ten short stories scatted hither and yon. A couple of years ago I made a point of reading free online fiction, and read a lot of good stuff, so I thought I'd do that again. I'm keeping track of them for the sake of my reading log, and hopefully I'll be able to push some traffic their way and provide a litte encouragement and feedback. Having published stories myself, I know that I scour the internet from time to time seeking some kind of response, and know the joy of finding it, even if the opinion is equivical.
Doctor Diablo Goes Through the Motions by Saladin Ahmed
This is a short super-hero pardoy that hits all the right notes and has some nice character touches. The central idea is pretty good - a supervillain's schemes that come full circle, and Ahmed's dry, characterful approach, made it a bit chewier than the average comics parody, although it does feel a little bit like the sort of thing that Alan Moore might have done in 1985. That's no bad thing, though, and this short and funny story is well worth ten minutes of your time.
Biting the Snake's Tail by Silvia Moreno-Garcia
This near future crime story is set in an over-populated Mexico City. It's got a strong procedural flavour as Gendarme Soledad follows up the murder of a the brass-with-a-heart bar girl. It turns out one of several girls to turn up killed and mutilated in recent months, and she appears to be on the track of a serial killer. She goes from witness to expert, attempting to pick up clues, but not getting very far. Moreno-Garcia does a good job of capturing the crowded out world of the slum where even the roads are blocked by the over-flowing humanity. In my own limited crime reading experience, it reminded me of Doll by Ed McBain, as it follows a similar line of crisp pacing and reliance on interrogation to provide a lot of the drama. I was kind of expecting it to end more conventionally, but that's not quite where it went. It took me a little while to appreciate what the story was up to, and it still feels a little like the first part a longer story and left me wanting to know more about where the case might lead her.
Labels:
reading log,
short fiction wednesday,
short stories
Tuesday, 23 February 2010
Today In History
On this day, in 1786, Sir Percy Dashington and his young ward Edwin Marshall were walking in the streets around Petticoat Lane in picturesque old London town. Edwin was a young engineer who had been enthused by the new technology of steam and had come to London in the hopes of meeting James Watt, who was alleged to have been in London at the time consulting the Lords regarding various of his patents.
As they turned the corner of one of the picturesque cobbled streets of this filmed-in-Prague scene, young Edwin exclaimed: "Why, nuncle! I believe my quarry is in sight!" He pointed into the crowds around the market. "Is that not James Watt himself?"
His guardian, being a Georgian fop somewhat like Leslie Howard in them Scarlet Pimpernel movies, arched his eyebrows er... archly and said, "Indeed?" He raised a pair of slightly anachronistic opera glasses to his face and scanned the crowd.
"If I can just explain to him my theories on pnuematics and hydraulics I am certain he will give me a place in his workshop!"
"Do you now," drawled Sir Percy, feeling an opportunity coming on to school the young fellow in the ways of the world. "I think you will find, young man, that prior acquaintance and family connections will serve you better in securing such a position." He dropped his opera glasses on their string and turned to his nephew. "And besides, as is ever the case, it's not Watt, you know. It's a hugenot."
His nephew regarded him blankly.
"Watt you know. Hugenot," said Sir Percy, leadingly, although his cloddish nephew was none the wiser. "Ah well, no matter. Tis time to sup cocoa."
As they turned the corner of one of the picturesque cobbled streets of this filmed-in-Prague scene, young Edwin exclaimed: "Why, nuncle! I believe my quarry is in sight!" He pointed into the crowds around the market. "Is that not James Watt himself?"
His guardian, being a Georgian fop somewhat like Leslie Howard in them Scarlet Pimpernel movies, arched his eyebrows er... archly and said, "Indeed?" He raised a pair of slightly anachronistic opera glasses to his face and scanned the crowd.
"If I can just explain to him my theories on pnuematics and hydraulics I am certain he will give me a place in his workshop!"
"Do you now," drawled Sir Percy, feeling an opportunity coming on to school the young fellow in the ways of the world. "I think you will find, young man, that prior acquaintance and family connections will serve you better in securing such a position." He dropped his opera glasses on their string and turned to his nephew. "And besides, as is ever the case, it's not Watt, you know. It's a hugenot."
His nephew regarded him blankly.
"Watt you know. Hugenot," said Sir Percy, leadingly, although his cloddish nephew was none the wiser. "Ah well, no matter. Tis time to sup cocoa."
Sunday, 21 February 2010
To the Devil -A Daughter!
I picked up this Dennis Wheatley occult thriller from the secondhand book stalls under Waterloo Bridge one wintery night in January. I love these book stalls, especially for finding these great old vintage paperbacks in good condition. This one's a handsome Arrow paperback with a rather stiff montage on the front cover, heavy on the goat's head and the suggestion of nubile nudity. The back cover has a terrific publicity shot of Dennis with a pen in his hand in his book-lined library, obviously hard at work in a blue satin dinner jacket and bow tie, fag in one hand and a glass of red wine nearby. When I was young, this is what I dreamed being a writer was all about!

EDIT: DON'T KNOW WHY THIS ISN'T SHOWING UP NICELY. THIS BLOG THING IS SO COMPLICATED!
These occulty thrillers always had an air of erotic eeriness about them when I was a kid. I remember in the seventies the salacious reputation of the Hammer movies of The Devil Rides Out and To the Devil - A Daughter; his books were also advertised in the back of colour supplements with imagery just like the cover of this edition.
The movies are far less sordid than their reputation suggests - The Devil Rides Out is pretty good, in fact - and the books are also a lot less shocking than the back cover blurb and imagery. They have much more in common with detective stories of Dorothy L Sayers and Sapper than they do with sex'n'gore exploitation paperbacks they shared shelf space with when I was a kid.
I read the Devil Rides Out a couple of years ago and found it very enjoyable - old fashioned, of course, but the Duke du Richelieu is a great character and Mocata an excellent villain. This is similarly old fashioned and also quite a lot of fun once you get used to it. It's set very tightly in the fifties, and deals entirely with the upper middle classes - everyone above is probably a decadent toff, while everyone below is either mean and cunning or the salt of the Earth. Wartime experience hangs over all the characters' back stories - I quite enjoyed that, as a matter of fact, as it gave a lot of interesting texture to the stories.
The setting is largely an entertainingly fashionable South of France, where everyone dresses for dinner and goes to the casino. It's a bit like James Bond, with a similar line in name dropping fancy food and drink and flash fifties brand names. A large proportion of the final third is occupied by a sojourn of rural Essex, where, away from the bright Mediterranean sunshime, the horror gets ramped up to apocalyptic levels.
In fact, it's interesting how Wheatley holds back any overt paranormalism until the final movement of the plot. What comes is all all the more effective because of this initial restraint, and Wheatley does a great line in suspense all the way through.The sequence where John Fountain attempts to infiltrate Comte de Grasse's yacht where Christina is being held is a fantastic example of balancing protagonsist action with antagonistic reaction to keep the reader on the edge of their seat regarding the outcome.
I liked the eccentric characters that populate this novel. Anna Fountain is middle-aged lady crime novellist with a taste for weapons; her son john Fountain is a two-fisted interior designer who pays careful attention to the decor of every setting; most of the heavy lefting is done by MI5 agent Bill Verney, known throughout as "C.B." or "Conky Bill" on account of his huge nose.
I enjoyed this a good deal. It makes me wonder why I don't get on with more modern iterations of the thriller and crime novel. Maybe I enjoy the camp? Like fantasy, it seems to throw the absurdity of it all into sharp releif, like an exceptionally well worked parody.
EDIT: DON'T KNOW WHY THIS ISN'T SHOWING UP NICELY. THIS BLOG THING IS SO COMPLICATED!
These occulty thrillers always had an air of erotic eeriness about them when I was a kid. I remember in the seventies the salacious reputation of the Hammer movies of The Devil Rides Out and To the Devil - A Daughter; his books were also advertised in the back of colour supplements with imagery just like the cover of this edition.
The movies are far less sordid than their reputation suggests - The Devil Rides Out is pretty good, in fact - and the books are also a lot less shocking than the back cover blurb and imagery. They have much more in common with detective stories of Dorothy L Sayers and Sapper than they do with sex'n'gore exploitation paperbacks they shared shelf space with when I was a kid.
I read the Devil Rides Out a couple of years ago and found it very enjoyable - old fashioned, of course, but the Duke du Richelieu is a great character and Mocata an excellent villain. This is similarly old fashioned and also quite a lot of fun once you get used to it. It's set very tightly in the fifties, and deals entirely with the upper middle classes - everyone above is probably a decadent toff, while everyone below is either mean and cunning or the salt of the Earth. Wartime experience hangs over all the characters' back stories - I quite enjoyed that, as a matter of fact, as it gave a lot of interesting texture to the stories.
The setting is largely an entertainingly fashionable South of France, where everyone dresses for dinner and goes to the casino. It's a bit like James Bond, with a similar line in name dropping fancy food and drink and flash fifties brand names. A large proportion of the final third is occupied by a sojourn of rural Essex, where, away from the bright Mediterranean sunshime, the horror gets ramped up to apocalyptic levels.
In fact, it's interesting how Wheatley holds back any overt paranormalism until the final movement of the plot. What comes is all all the more effective because of this initial restraint, and Wheatley does a great line in suspense all the way through.The sequence where John Fountain attempts to infiltrate Comte de Grasse's yacht where Christina is being held is a fantastic example of balancing protagonsist action with antagonistic reaction to keep the reader on the edge of their seat regarding the outcome.
I liked the eccentric characters that populate this novel. Anna Fountain is middle-aged lady crime novellist with a taste for weapons; her son john Fountain is a two-fisted interior designer who pays careful attention to the decor of every setting; most of the heavy lefting is done by MI5 agent Bill Verney, known throughout as "C.B." or "Conky Bill" on account of his huge nose.
I enjoyed this a good deal. It makes me wonder why I don't get on with more modern iterations of the thriller and crime novel. Maybe I enjoy the camp? Like fantasy, it seems to throw the absurdity of it all into sharp releif, like an exceptionally well worked parody.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)